So my sister and I had a conversation once about skipping. I told her that I was watching a movie and the kids were skipping and they looked so happy. So, I figured that the key to happinness is skipping. Now when kids skip, it looks fun. When adults skip, not so much. If you have any kind of weight on you, the noise alone should stop you in your tracks from this fun loving sport of children. Things slap, crackle & pop like no one's business. And I didn't use the word "snap" on purpose. It's not a snap noise, it's a slap noise. I've heard it. It's not pretty. We decided that skipping was NOT the answer to our happiness. We'll leave it to the kids. Oh, by the way, teenagers don't do well with skipping either. I saw a teenager in front of the Greece Olympia High School that was skipping down the sidewalk and I felt bad for him. At first I thought he was a special needs student and then realized that he was just frolicky. Poor thing is never going to find a girlfriend. Not if he keeps skipping like that. Drats, I was so hoping to find a new exercise!

So then I was in the Walmart parking lot sitting in my truck with the air conditioner on because I have poison ivy or poison oak or some other creepy crawlie fungus that is invading my body and I didn't want to get out of my truck. I watched a man with his young son come out of Walmart. The kid had to be around 3 or 4 and was wearing a cape over his shorts and t-shirt. A bright red cape that resembled the one from the movie "The Incredibles". Now, this kid was not just wearing this cape, he was "sporting" this cape. He was all that with a bag of chips. He kept flinging it over his shoulder and he had his dad by the hand and kept jumping up to try to fly. His dad did not help him with this feat and I was going to get out of my truck and skip over to help him fly but didn't want to scare them. Now I'm wondering if happiness is in the wearing of capes? Think of the wonderful super heroes we could be. Of course, half the time, I'd be called a "Stupor hero". But I could have fun. Anyone care to join me? I could wear a cape, shove my wine glass in between my lips and skip down my sister's sidewalk in her neighborhood and actually fit right in!!

Okay, on to the poison ivy. I owe my son a huge apology for all the years that this child has endured poison ivy. I always tried to help him with it but couldn't understand the agony that he went through because I have never had poison ivy before. I have always just figured that I was not allergic to it. I've spent enough time outdoors that I should have been exposed before but nothing ever happened. So I was mowing the lawn at the barn and I use a huge Ransome lawn tractor that was purchased from Spencerport Schools. I have to mow under a bunch of trees and just ram the front end of the tractor under the branches. I saw the vines. I looked at the vines. I wondered what those vines were doing in that tree. Maybe the wine glass in between my lips has caused brain damage. I drove into it anyways and never thought twice about it. And then I went home and took a nap on top of my bed. Later that night, my scalp itched so bad I thought someone had dumped itching powder on my head. And then---I got in the shower. I think this also helped in running that wonderful oil all over my body. I am covered from head to toe. I have been itching in places that you shouldn't scratch yourself. Whether you're a kid or a grownup. I finally went to the doctor and got put on steroids with a side of cortizone shot. So, now I'm a maniac with so much energy that I think I could probably take up skipping and not even care about the noise!! In my cape!! With a wineglass stuck between my lips! Are we getting the picture here? So my apologies to my kid for telling him for years not to scratch himself and suck up and deal with it. Apparently, I am not winning the parent of the year award once again. But if I did ever win it, I would wear a cape. And skip. And shove a wine glass in between my lips. And I think I would add a tierra. But only if my son was there so I could horrify him. It's what I live for.